Larkspur Wellness

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Do Your Goals Support Your Values?

you’re struggling to fulfil the goals and dreams you have set for yourself, it is likely, your goals and values do not align.

If our goals are not aligned with our values, goal fulfilment is impossible. We don’t like behaving in ways that contradict our values. If a mismatch exists, the goal needs to change.

Before I set goals with some of my clients, we work together in-depth to discover their values and distil them down — what is of the upmost importance to them, their non-negotiable core values. When you have your top four values, they can guide every decision and keep you moving in the direction that best serves your highest self.

If you’re finding that achieving your dreams seems nearly impossible, your values might be at odds with your goals.

Use these steps to set goals that support your values:

1. List your current values. Have you ever taken the time to examine your values? Most people have never given their values a second thought, we know what is important to us, but we’ve never verbalised it. A person’s values guide their thinking, decisions, and actions.

  • Take 30 minutes and list your values. Put them in order of their priority to you.

  • Ask yourself if your behaviour is aligned with your values. What set of values would represent your behaviour if there’s a mismatch?

  • Most of us have an idealised impression of our intentions, values, and qualities.

2. What are you trying to accomplish? What are your goals in life? What do you want to have achieved at the end of your life? Do you want to be financially stable? Have a family? Build a business? Be fit and healthy? The first step to setting any goal is to identify your objectives.

3. How do your current values impact your goals? If your values and dreams don’t match, the odds of success are dismal without something changing.

  • For example, if you believe that money is the root of all evil, you’ll never accumulate significant wealth, which is not necessarily an unhealthy outcome.

  • If comfort is a high priority for you, being physically fit and healthy may be unlikely.

  • Do you value having a lot of leisure time? A goal that requires significant dedication isn’t going to work for you.

  • Look at your goals and look at your values. Do your goals support those values? Do your values support your goals?

4. What would be the perfect set of values to support your goals? Imagine you could build a person from scratch who would easily accomplish your goals. What values and qualities would they possess? How would you be different if you had these values? Think about the people you know who have accomplished what you want. How would you describe them?

5. How can you adapt your goals to suit your values better? People try to change their values to fit their goals, but this doesn’t work because your values are your core identity. Changing your core identity to serve a goal means you are likely trying to pursue something you think you should. Your goal could have been formed through learned behavior; for example, you think you should want something because your parents, partner or peers want it for you, or they want it for themselves. Working with a coach to help discover what you want can be truly enlightening.

6. Reinforce behaviors that matter. Imagine that your goal is to set up a business. Let’s suppose you’ve determined that you need to be someone who is committed, dedicated and passionate about doing so. How can you embody these qualities?

  • Prove to yourself that you’re that type of person: For example, start reading business books, look at working with a mentor or coach, look to the people you have identified as models and arrange a coffee or a Zoom date to get inside advice and find out how they did it.

  • Those actions will build and reinforce when you repeatedly prove that you possess a quality.

Are your goals and values a good match? When a mismatch exists, it’s crucial to alter your goals. A person can overcome only so much resistance, and your values will always win. Success is much easier when your values and your intentions are highly compatible.

Welcome to LARKSPUR WELLNESS

My coaching is a little different than most. I blend holistic longevity practices with psychology, assessments, strategies and tools to help guide my clients toward their goals- fast.

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